


Do You Remember?

by vendingmachinefromhell



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Cliche af, Fluff, Other, Reader is depressed, Swearing, also a character's pain gets sorta described as well so theres that, character death i guess, i still suck at tagging, sorta bittersweet ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-24
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-05-23 01:00:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6099664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vendingmachinefromhell/pseuds/vendingmachinefromhell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One night, you had a dream about a skeleton. After that, your life seemed to change forever, even if it was in a minuscule way no one else would notice.<br/>For that skeleton reappeared in your dreams since then. With that, you gained a friend. But despite that, you still hid a lot of things from him, and you wondered if he did the same.<br/>But he was just a figment of your imagination, someone to keep your lonely self in the waking world at least somewhat happy, right?<br/>Sometimes though, you wished that wasn't the case.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> heeeeyyy I did say I had like, 5 things in mind, and this one shot was one of the things.  
> this took me a little over an hour to write sooooo yeah
> 
> enjoy nonetheless. v.

You don't remember when you met Sans, or how, but it doesnt matter. You were just glad you knew him. Glad he loved you just as much as you loved him.

He was quite the quirky guy, always cracking jokes, more silly, bad ones on purpose over actual ‘good’ jokes, it got a nice reaction from his peers. You loved the stupid puns, but you pretended to be annoyed whenever he told a joke to please him.

He had an affinity for science as well, especially physics and astronomy. It was the only other time he got excited while talking, besides talking about his brother. It was adorable. How his eye-lights would sparkle when he got passionate, you just wanted to squeeze him to death in a hug when he got like that. But you didn't dare disrupt his little rants, it was a pretty rare experience. You were lost in these moments, but you did your best to understand anyways. Man did Sans appreciate it.

He was a skeleton, which threw you off at first. Appearances never really mattered to you, you still liked him equally. He was the shorter between him and his brother. And somehow, despite being a literal skeleton, he managed to be a chubby person.

No matter how much you tried, you could never convince him to take off his coat. You were almost certain he showered in it. Like how he said his brother would with his ‘battle body.’

All in all, you loved everything about Sans. And you could only hope he felt the same.

You don't remember when you started dating, just that you were. Neither of you complained about it. Sans seemed to be unable to recall the time you began dating either. But, he did seem to know _something_. He avoided it every time you asked though. So you stopped pushing it.

Since Sans seemed to like the stars so much, you set up countless dates with space. You went to Astro museums, spent nights watching the sky (you even managed to see the northern lights. He was amazed at the sight. Now he tried constantly to see them again), and on simpler dates, you would watch some space movies or TV shows. You loved seeing his pupils dilate to actual stars when he talked or thought about the subject. It was simply too adorable.

You don't remember ever getting in fights with Sans. Just, pure, blissful moments. Maybe you two were meant to be soul mates, maybe. He talked about souls every once and awhile. Apparently, he could make yours out. He said it was beautiful. An infinite amount of questions came flowing out of your mouth. It was another subject he avoided, so he never said anything besides how pretty it was.

The last date you remember having with him was one of the movie dates. You were curled up against Sans, watching the screen intently, snacking on the popcorn bowl sitting next to you. Sans was watching as well, but he seemed distracted. Like something was off. So you asked him what was wrong, expecting him to brush your question off. He surprised you by turning his attention from the screen to look at you. You returned his gaze, awaiting his ‘it’s all fine’ reply, but instead, he held your hands, and leaned in to whisper in your ear;

“it’s time for you to wake up.”

 

Your blaring alarm shook you awake, making most of your dreams flee away. Groggily, you sat up in bed, reaching for the notebook that always manages to find itself on the ground. Jotting down everything you remember from last night's dreams, you smiled to yourself from the thoughts. It was a nice dream.

As you got ready for the day ahead, your mind wandered over to the skeleton in your dreams.

_Sans_ , you thought, _what an interesting character_.


	2. The Bad Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i never really planned to add onto this really, but after a four hour nap today i sort of just woke up and had this idea  
> it's pretty much me just venting, but it managed to fit into this so here you go  
> have some sad

You found yourself sleeping more often after that one dream. That Sans guy kept showing up in your other dreams as well, and, despite him not being real, you rather enjoyed his company in your sleep.

While that skeleton wasn’t the only reason why you would rather sleep than stay awake, you didn’t really want to delve into the other reasons. It was just more pleasant to sleep, you’ll settle with that.

Every dream was a different scenario, sometimes you had known him for a while, sometimes you had just met him, sometimes you weren’t even _in_ the picture, you were just observing him with other creatures and people. But most of your dreams had him now. It was almost concerning. Even to the point where you considered going to therapy about it.

You never did, though. You actually never told anyone about your dreams. No one but you knew about them, you were worried what might happen if you did tell someone. Someone could find out though, for you wrote down everything you could remember about each and every dream you had.

Like you had thought earlier, every dream was a different scenario, except for one thing. Sans seemed aware that he was in a dream. Since every time, right before you woke up, he would turn his attention to you - even in the dreams where you didn’t exist - and remind you to wake up.

Today, you had a particularly bad day, so you found yourself curled up in bed, beginning to drift off into your dreams. Your mind wandered sleepily over to what the next dream with Sans would be like, hopefully a nice, good, cheerful one. Those were always the best. Sometimes that wasn’t the case.

As you drifted off, the dream started to set into place. You were walking through a park on a nice, warm, summer day. Little was worrying itself away at your mind.

You came to a stop in front of a hot dog stand, where the skeleton of your dreams stood. He was lazily leaning against the stand, a cheek pressed against the palm of his hand, he looked bored.

“‘afternoon, sunshine,” his ever present grin grew when he spotted you, “lookin’ to buy?”

“Of course,” you returned his smile, “How much?”

He hummed, tapping a finger against the stand as he readied a hot dog for you, “it’s on the house, if ya let me chat with you for a bit, that is.”

“Sure, it’s always nice to get free food if it’s offered,” you nodded a thanks as he handed you your food. He stood up, placing an ‘away’ sign on the counter and falling into stride next to you.

“So, any particular reason as to why you want to talk?” You asked between mouthfuls, despite it only being a dream, it tasted really good.

Sans hummed out an agreement, “yeah,” he sighed before gazing at you with his bright eye-lights, “kiddo, ya gotta stop sleeping so much.”

You stopped in the middle of your tracks, staring back at him. You knew he was aware he was part of a dream, but he never acknowledged it until the end, he never brought it up like this. You didn’t even realize he remembered every dream you had, if that was what he was hinting at.

“Wh-what do you mean?” You gulped down the last bit of your meal.

“y’know what i mean, kid,” he turned to face you, making the conversation almost seem like a normal, everyday kind of topic, “i’m not one to judge, but it’s gettin’ worse for you.”

“So? At least these dreams are better than what’s real…” you mumbled, turning your gaze to your feet instead of Sans’ intense eyes.

“but they ain’t real. you’re livin’ a lie with all this,” he gestured everywhere around him, “kid,” he took a step towards you, “it’s time to wake up. save these dreams for the night.”

You backed away, glaring daggers at him, “What if I don’t want to wake up?! What if I like living this lie?! Just- Just let me have this! Please…” you sobbed, closing in on yourself, you crouched down in the dirt, burying your face in your hands, “Please, just let me be happy for once…”

He was silent as he knelt down in front of you, placing a hand on your shoulder. It was quiet between you two for what felt like hours before he finally said something.

“the dreams over kid, go wake up.”

It was the first time in a long while you woke up in tears.


	3. The Nighmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You have a dream that's just a little different compared to the other ones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiiiiii  
> its sure been a while since I've posted something, eh?  
> sorry about that ;c; My motivation seems to lie entirely into a fic I cant really post yet since its a co-written fic and my friend has yet to get internet so we can work on it (pssst its Take the Edge Off you should totally read it)  
> and another, incredibly self-indulgent fic i hope to never post cause man.  
> at least its not smut.  
> ANYWAYS, ironically enough, I came up with this idea from sleeping as well, same as the last chapter! It's so weird how these things happen.  
> Anyways, enjoy this sorta short thing i came up with~~~

Sans stopped talking to you after you refused to acknowledge his request. When you’d dream, you would always be a spectator instead, no choice whatsoever in what goes on.

He also stopped reminding you to wake up, it was really like you didn’t exist. It was unnerving to think about.

But your reason for sleeping so much still stood strong. You were just, always tired, no amount of caffeine or sleep seemed to help with the exhaustion you felt, and you also just weren’t having a best time in the waking world still. Sleep, even when you’ve been scolded by a person from your dreams, was much more favorable.

Except for this dream.

Usually the dreams were of Sans doing regular daily activities, maybe trying to convince you to wake up that way, but this sleep session was different.

Instead, you were watching a scene very, very different.

The scene was different even, not like the pretty exteriors of the outside world. It was more like a weird pathway overlooking a bright and steamy drop. It hurt to look at even.

Sans was standing on the path, facing what seemed to look like a taller skeleton, but it was hard to tell, it almost looked like it was… glitching?

You couldn’t hear anything that was being said, but whatever was going on, Sans did not seem to be very happy about it. It looked like he was shouting at the taller skeleton, gesturing wildly. You couldn’t help but wonder what agitated him so much.

After a few minutes of Sans growing more and more furious, you saw something you’ve only ever seen in the dreams that- no, you weren’t going to think of those. Not now.

His left eye blazed blue and yellow, left arm flying to the side, bringing the taller skeleton with it, and over the edge. It took a second for Sans to realize what he had just done, but it was too late to fix his mistake. In that same second, all your other senses you didn’t realize you had lost came flooding back.

Screams from both skeletons flooded your ears, accompanied with the sound of air rushing past you. The smell of chlorine and sparks burned your nose, with it getting stronger every second. It was strong enough for you to taste it as well.

But, what got you the most was how you felt. It felt like you were burning alive, that you were melting at the same time. It was excruciating, your limbs were melting away in gross piles of black goo, your face was melting, cracking even. Even your hands.

The pain was so horrible that you almost didn’t hear the string of ‘sorry’s coming from the shorter skeleton, bringing yourself to focus on him instead.

Suddenly, you were real, you weren’t a spectator like usual. The pain was still there and throbbing though. Sans was knelt on the ground before you, cupping your face in his hands, the touch cooling to your burning skin.

“i’m so sorry,” the skeleton wept, tears pouring out of his eye sockets, “i didn’t mean for you to experience something like this.”

He stared at you for a while, before pressing his forehead against yours, begging, “please, just wake up.”

The world began to melt away with those words, everything slowly subsiding, the last thing you felt was the skeleton’s cooling embrace.

 

You woke up doused in your own sweat, breathing as if you just finished a marathon. Oh god you could still feel the melting effect, even after waking up.

Slowly, you curled up in bed, letting the tears fall from your last dream. It felt so real, it was the first time Sans talked to you in ages. It was so different from everything else, you knew you wouldn’t forget that dream for a long, long time.

Taking in a shaky breath, you rubbed furiously at your wet eyes, deciding that you might take a break from sleeping for a little while.


	4. The Different Sans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You encounter a Sans that you don't recognize in one of your dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two things in one day hoo boy i am MOTIVATED  
> why do i keep coming up with ideas for this after i wake up from sleep  
> what is with that  
> well, the second half came to me whilst i was writing but the initial idea came after i woke up  
> its so weird but i love it  
> anyways have this  
> its less angsty this time

You avoided sleeping more after that nightmare. For the fear of experiencing anything like that again. The pain was so vivid you could still remember what it was like, even now.

When you did eventually sleep, everything seemed normal instead. Sans acted like that nightmare never happened, maybe he just didn’t remember any of the dreams? Maybe he just knew that he was in a dream, not the contents of the previous ones. You tried to forget the nightmare as well, but it was hard. Very hard. In every dream you worried it would melt away into something terrifying like that. Whenever that though started to weigh on you too much though, something in the dream would distract you sending all negativity like that away. You sure didn’t mind that.

It was a different story for spectator dreams though. In those there was nothing to distract you, and you had absolutely no control in what would happen. The melting feeling would creep up your limbs every time. You would panic to the point of waking up, it was truly horrible.

So instead of spending your time sleeping, you drew or cleaned around your home. Anything to avoid future nightmares. Currently your home was spotless, so you were stuck with drawing. But you were also stuck on drawing. You had no inspiration, no interesting ideas. In fact, you’ve been staring at an empty page for the last hour. Well, it probably wasn’t entirely inspiration. It was also probably due to it being four in the morning and that you’re also more focused on trying to stay awake.

Ironic how just one nightmare is enough to make you follow the skeleton’s wishes.

But since you really couldn’t do anything due to your tiredness, you forced yourself to set your sketchbook away for the ~~morning~~ night and shut of your light. Now you just had to lay in your bed for who knows how long, pondering the meaning of life until sleep finally takes hold of you.

It was safe to say you were surprised by the dream that greeted you.

Thankfully, you weren’t a spectator, but that was the least of your worries. You were in Sans’ house, it was also one of the constants in your dreams, it never changed just like the skeleton. Except for this time. Instead of the mismatched but warm interior and atmosphere, everything was in shades of red and black, and the air dripped with tension.

The Sans next to you was not the Sans you were used to either. When the two of you locked eyes with each other both of you jumped to the opposite sides of the couch like the other was toxic. Now that you were facing him, you got a closer look at how different he was from the Sans you knew. If you could describe his whole appearance in one word, it would be ‘edgy.’ He looked like he was still stuck in his weird and embarrassing goth or emo phase from high school, it was ridiculous. His outfit was similar to the Sans you were used to, it just was also more black and red than white and blue. It seemed this Sans had more motivation to wear something besides slippers, with black and red sneakers on his feet instead. And the basketball shorts he’d have on were still black, but yellow lines replaced the white ones. The hoodie he always wore was black, and the shirt underneath a deep maroon. And was that a gold tooth?

Moving your gaze back up to his eyes your heart stopped. There were no friendly white eye-lights to greet you. Only a terrifying single red iris in his left eye glaring you down. Oh god was this going to be one of those dreams?

“what th’ fuck are you starin’ at?” he growled at you. Shrinking even further away from him, you avoided that piercing eye.

“So-sorry,” you squeaked, holding your hands close to your chest.

“what are ya even doin’ here?”

Taking in a deep breath, you tried to calm down your pounding heart before replying, “W-well to answer both of those questions; I’m your little dream buddy, you know?” The angry face of his dissolved into a confused one, showing that he did not, in fact, know.

“You know, like, uh, I fall asleep for whatever reason and I end up in some weird dream with you in it. Well, you but not you,” you groaned, burying your face into your hands, “I’m horrible at explaining this.”

“yeah yeah, i know all that,” he grumbled, gaze turning hard again, “i’m asking ya why yer here.”

“I-I don’t understand?” he already knew all that? Well, your Sans seemed to realize he was in a dream since the first one. It embarrassingly took you forever to realize you were dreaming unlike him. Maybe any Sans you would run into would realize he was in a dream. Your train of thought was starting to get weird and you did not want to participate in how much it could confuse you any more than you already are, so you turned your attention back to the sort-of-familiar skeleton.

“it’s grossly early for you to give me a visit, and yer a lot more, skittish than normal,” he sounded bored almost, and his single pupil bore into you in an analyzing way.

“You’re used to me popping in at literally any time,” you narrowed your eyes at him, “And maybe I’m more ‘skittish’ ‘cause you’re nothing like the Sans I know, even though you seem like you’re the same person.”

“And yer nothin’ like the human I know, but ya look pretty similar to ‘em,” he spat back.

You didn’t reply, you just crossed your arms and avoided looking at the not-Sans. It was clear neither of you had actually met before, but you both have seen each other, just, it was a different ‘you.’

“Hey,” you finally said after a very long silence, “Do you think your human and I swapped places somehow?”

“it’s a possibility,” he stole a glance your way now that you felt more open to talk.

“Well, it seems likely,” you sighed, staring at the ceiling above you, “I wonder what caused all this to happen.”

“i’m still confused about the whole dream thing,” the skeleton slumped in his spot, “now this’s a new thing to be confused at. great.”

“You and me both,” you turned to him, a curious glint in your eyes, “ So, what’s your version of me like?”

He snickered, training his bright red iris to you, “I’ll share if ya tell me ‘bout yer Sans.”

“Deal,” you smiled, holding out a hand.

“deal,” he repeated, taking your hand in his. A sharp shock exploded up your arm, causing you to pull it back in fear. Looking up from your stinging arm to the skeleton, you grit your teeth in annoyance. He was staring at you with a shit-eating grin, waving the culprit of the shock lazily in the air.

“pretty _shockin’_ of an experience, eh?” he chuckled, pocketing the buzzer.

“Well, there’s one difference,” you laughed sheepishly along, rubbing at your sore palm.

You spent hours with the skeleton, tossing differences between each other most of the time. It was interesting hearing about a you who wasn’t exactly you. They seemed a lot more outspoken and enthusiastic than you. But they also seemed incredibly rude and you prayed for Sans if it was true that you swapped places with them.

You wanted to know what the other you’s reason for sleeping was for. From what you gathered from this Sans, they usually kept a more normal schedule than you, and never really opened up when it came to the more abnormal times. Too bad, you wanted to know how their waking life compared to yours.

After everything was said and done, you woke up reasonably late and got ready for the day with an extra pep in your step. Despite how that Sans was terrifying in the beginning, he wasn’t actually that bad of a guy. He literally was just a dork who was in his edgy phase. You really wouldn’t mind seeing him again, though you didn’t really know what it would mean if all that happened another time.

You were right though, that you and the other you swapped places that one night. Your Sans was not pleased to see you the next you slept. In fact, he was pretty furious. It was a miracle that you managed to dodge the bony fist that flew towards your face.

“what was with you?!” he practically screamed, left eye flashing his dangerous blue and yellow.

“Hey, hey, Sans!” you gasped, grabbing at his wrist before it made painful contact with your face, “Whatever happened last dream, that was not me! Chill, wow.”

He just stared at you blankly, arm still tense in your grip, “what?”

“Did you really not put two and two together?” you questioned, pushing his arm down, “I managed to switch places with another me somehow.”

“another… you?” the agitated skeleton calmed down somewhat, beckoning you to elaborate more.

“Okay, can we sit down for this though? It’s sort of a bit to explain,” he nodded, pushing you into the couch with him plopping down next to you soon after.

“okay spill.”

Laughing at his eagerness to know, you sucked in a deep breath to prepare yourself. Once you were sure you were ready, you told him about the contents of your previous dream to him.

After you finished all the details, the room was deadly quiet for a minute as the information sank in for Sans. You patiently waited for him to collect all his thoughts, idly tapping the couch cushion.

“you’re encounter was definitely better than mine,” he sighed, sinking into the couch, “it’s like they were tryin’ to piss me off.”

“Seemed like it worked.”

“yeah,” he sucked in a breathe, “sorry ‘bout that.”

“Don’t fret over it,” you smiled at him.

“anyways,” Sans drawled out, “shouldn’t ya be awake? it’s the middle of the day.”

“I was tired, alright?” you groaned, rubbing a hand down your face.

“three in the afternoon is a time you should be awake at.”

“Life’s tiring, you know? Anyways, when were you able to tell the time like that?”

Sans stopped his reply suddenly, staring at his hands for a moment, “i- when did that start happening?”

You shrugged, jumping off the couch and stretching, “Who knows, but fine. I’ll take your advice and wake up now. See you at a more reasonable sleeping hour, hopefully.”

Before you woke up though, you turned to Sans, keeping your posture as light as possible, you didn’t want him to know how you really felt about the subject, “Did the other me tell you what their life was like outside of the dreams?”

He scoffed, looking at you in disbelief, “you don’t share anything about your outside life with me, you think they would?”

“Fair point,” you sighed, “I was just curious, that’s all. Bye for real now,” you forced out a small laugh as the dream faded around you.

 

You laid in your bed for a long time in silence upon waking up, mulling over your previous dreams. From what you gathered, the other you seemed to have a less stressful life than you, or they were able to handle it easier than you were able to.

You curled into your blankets, biting back unnecessary tears. Why did the other you seem to handle things so much better. Why were they able to stay awake and face life more than you?

It was so... unfair.


	5. The Rebound

It was another bad day, you were having those more often. You didn’t know what sparked them anymore, you stopped caring. You just wished they would stop.

You were having a hard time, a hard time getting out of bed, a hard time cleaning yourself, a hard time even eating. All you wanted to do was sleep, but even that was hard for you, despite being so sleepy all the time. You don’t remember when you dropped your phone, somewhere off the edge of your bed, but you were just too tired to reach over and grab it. Like you had any use for it at the moment.

Usually, you were able to bounce back after a day or two of watching silly youtube videos that made you laugh. There was one channel in particular that helped you always, except you had already watched the one series to cheer you up the most dozens of times since this chain of slumps started, it seemed to have stopped working. You were losing hope, hope of ever getting out of your depression this time.

Whenever you tried to gain your motivation back to do anything, draw, write, just go for a walk for god’s sake, you would always get close, so close. And then something would happen to drag you back straight to square one.

It was awful, and you were getting so tired of it. You were getting tired in general. Sans seemed to note it.

“you’ve been sleeping more, you know?” he nonchalantly brought up in one of your dreams, “care to tell me why?”

“What makes you think I’ll tell you this time?”

“‘cause you’ve been gettin’ worse, kid. i’m worried ‘bout ya.”

Why would a recurring skeleton that exists only in your dreams worry about you? Why couldn’t it be someone real instead. You laughed bitterly. It was because you never confided in anyone about anything, and you were sure everyone who knew you either didn’t notice or didn’t care that you were starting to break.

“I’ve just been so tired recently.”

“tell me somethin’ i don’t know.”

“Well, um, ugh,” you sighed, waving your arms around, trying to come up with the right words. “Yeah, I’m tired physically and all, hence why I’m sleeping. But I mean,” you paused, sucking in a breath. Did you really need to when you were sleeping? Who knows.

“I’m tired of being awake. I’m tired of living, tired of having to deal with these stupid emotions.”

“I have no idea how long I’ve been like this. At first, I didn’t understand, I didn’t even really realize I was depressed. Then as the years passed I finally realized what it was. I was scared in the beginning, scared of being miserable, scared of not being able to get out of bed. Then I mellowed out, it doesn’t really help when your own depressed mother accepts the fact that she’s going to be hopeless her whole life. Makes you think you’re going to be like her too.”

“I was, I was okay with it for the longest of times. I didn’t tell anyone I was feeling the way I was, and when I did, I realized I had no way to actually get help for this. It sort of happens when your family doesn’t have much money outside of food and bills, you sort of deal with the fact that you’re going to be like this forever.”

“It’s affected me so much, I don’t think I could even be happy anymore, like, I forgot what it was to feel that way. I don’t know how to ask for help, I don’t even know where to go for help, I feel so lost, so hopeless, so ready to quit.”

You didn’t realize you were crying at first, but once you did you tried to wipe away the tears, you tried to go back to the moment where you didn’t share how shitty you felt. A bony pair of hands placed themselves on top of yours, holding onto them carefully and slowly bringing them down from your face. Sans was in front of you, gazing into your eyes with large eye lights. He didn’t say anything as he brought you into a tight hug.

It was surprising at first, you didn’t expect him to do that. Hesitantly, you pulled up you shivering arms, wrapping them around his torso as you choked back a sob. With one deep breath, you let it all out. You cried, and wept and wailed, it was okay for you to, it was okay for you to cry loudly for the first time in forever. You didn't have to to hold your breath and let the tears fall quietly anymore. You could be as loud as you wanted, and only Sans would hear you. And so you did. You cried until your face was puffy from the tears, until your eyes couldn’t produce anymore, until your voice was hoarse from your weeping. Sans never let go the entire time.

When you calmed down enough, you dropped your arms, pulling away from the skeleton. Letting out a watery chuckle, you wiped at your wet eyes. It was always an uncomfortable feeling having them be damp like that.

“you alright now?” his smiled looked a little more genuine.

“Yeah, I’m feeling a little better.”

“you know, you can always come to me when you’re feelin’ bad. i’m here to listen.”

You laughed, smiling at the skeleton. He looked more relieved to see you with a smile one your face. “I literally just told you I’m awful at asking for help.”

“so? doesn’t mean you can’t try to have someone to talk to. somethin’ is better than nothin,’ kiddo.”

You grinned at the skeleton, of course he was right about that. You could always start with him. You felt a pang in your chest, remembering that he was just part of a dream, and that wasn’t enough. Still, you hugged him tightly.

“Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this started out as its own thing in the beginning so that would explain why it starts out a little weird. I still liked the bit i had written before, and i realized it fit with this whole chunk of stories after that and yeah.  
> so, this is just one really big vent because ive been dealing with some really bad depression recently, and a lot of the stuff brought up here is stuff ive either experienced or felt at some point and ive brought it up in What Could Go Wrong too in the notes of the latest chapter. ive been having a really hard time dealing with it because i realized i dont really have any kind of way to get help for my depression, so its been making my hopelessness sorta skyrocket haha  
> i legit actually started crying while writing this but that because its all personal stuff that makes me hurt emotionally a lot  
> this is all so messy, im sorry im posting this i just sorta pumped it out after listening to They Move On Tacks of Never-Ending Light on repeat for 10 times because its very pretty and makes me write sad things like this  
> now excuse me i think im going to go sleep now, crying makes you really tired


End file.
